Being the maid of honour is fun and exciting but it’s also a very important job. After all, you’re the bride’s right-hand woman throughout her engagement, during the entire wedding day and even during the days after. You are there for her through thick and thin, including all of the pre-wedding events and planning. Not to mention serving as her closest confidant when she needs a shoulder to cry on and some sound advice. It’s a lot of responsibility, but it doesn’t have to feel overwhelming if you know what to do and when to do it. Which is why you’ll want to keep handy this ultimate checklist of maid of honor duties.
1. Be there for the bride
Before and after the wedding, your biggest job is to be there for the bride. This shouldn’t be that difficult since chances are you’re already pretty close. Initiate the conversation on how you can best support the bride on both an emotional and practical level. Ask her how you can help out the most as she plans the wedding, and don’t forget you’re friends too. So inject some fun and love into the festivities too! Help your bride to relax and enjoy the wedding planning process as you both create some lasting memories together.
2. Check in with everyone’s budget
Before you start planning bachelorette parties and showers, or even dress fittings, the best thing you can do is discuss the budget with the bride and the rest of the wedding party. After all, you don’t want to plan for a big girls’ trip to Vegas when no one can afford it. Or worse yet — settle on wedding day dresses that’s not in their budget.
3. You’re the point person for the bridesmaids
You are the leader of the bridesmaids. If they have any questions or suggestions, they are to go to you first and not the bride (since she’s already so busy with planning to deal with tons of questions). Start a group chat and/or email thread with everyone in the party to keep on track and delegate any duties. You might also want to use organization apps, such as Asana, to keep track of everyone’s tasks.
4. Attend wedding dress shopping and dress fittings
This is probably the most anticipated event for the MOH! While the bride might want to attend her wedding dress shopping alone or with her mom, many MOHs attend as well. So check in with your bride and ask if she wants you there. You should definitely be on hand when it comes to choosing your dress as well as the wedding party’s since you are the go-to person when it comes to choosing the bridesmaids’ attire.
5. Set up all fittings and beauty appointments
You’re in charge of setting up (and attending) all dress fittings for the bride, yourself, and the bridal party. Additionally, you’re to schedule the hair and makeup appointments for the big day too. Make sure you settle on who and where you’re going with the bride, and book appointments at least six months in advance.
6. Host or co-host the bridal shower
You’ll be hosting the bridal shower with the rest of the bridesmaids and probably with the bride’s mother and/or other family members. You’ll need to choose the date, the venue, the catering and the decor. After the event, you’re responsible for helping the bride send out thank you cards. Don’t forget to delegate these tasks with other members of the bridal party if it’s too much work for you.
7. Plan the bachelorette party
You’re leading the charge when it comes to planning the bachelorette party. While you’ll be doing this with the other members of the bridal party, you’re the point-person for the event when it comes to choosing the venue, connecting with other invitees, and keeping everyone’s budget in mind. Also, you’ll also have to plan a bachelorette party that the bride will actually want and like — so don’t forget to have this conversation with her before you book anything.
8. Prepare a bride’s emergency survival kit
This is something the bride will have on hand for every event before the wedding and for the wedding itself. Think bandaids, safety pins, pain relievers, hair ties, and anything else you can think of.
9. Prepare a speech for the reception
Yes, you have to do a speech! But this is a sweet and memorable moment to express your feelings for the bride and her new groom. Prepare your speech at least a month in advance so you have enough time to practice it and feel comfortable with what you’re going to say.
10. Keep everything moving
On the day of the wedding, it’s your responsibility to keep everything moving on schedule. This includes helping the bride getting dressed and having makeup and hair done to getting to the ceremony on time to making sure the bridesmaids are ready for the photo session (and not busy chatting). You’re also responsible for tying up all loose ends, like collecting gifts and any mementoes that the couple want to keep on their big day.
Like we said, it’s a big job but with a little planning and a handy checklist, you’ll be well on your way to being the best MOH!